Are You a Man or Are You a Mess?
(Caring for Yourself or the Male in Your Life)
I. Physical Health
A. The “MANual”
B. Why don’t men see the doctor?
1. Societal views toward men
a. He is fearless
b. He is expendable
c. He is independent and doesn’t
need help
2. Men’s personal fears and concerns
a. Phobic about medical procedures
b. Difficulty dealing with blood
c. Fatalism
3. Common male points of view
a. I’ll be OK—I don’t need help
b. If I just wait, it’ll go
away
c. Doctors don’t know what
they’re talking about and are expensive
C. Three biggest concerns for men as they age
1. Heart disease
a. Risk factors
i.
Male gender= increased risk factor
ii. Family history
iii. Untreated diabetes
iv. Cigarette smoking
v. Hypertension
vi. Obesity
vii. Inactivity
b. How does heart disease
occur?
c. Limitations
for heart disease patients
i. Physical activity
ii. Big meals
iii. Sexual activity
iv. Travel in cold climates
d. Prevention
i. Cardiovascular exercise
ii. Eat properly
2. Obesity
a. Doubles chance
of early death
b. Major cardiovascular
risk
c. Social and psychological
problems
d. Physical problems
with joints and spine
e. Quality of life
issues
f. Often related
to diabetes
3. Cancer
a. Most common
types
i. Lung
ii. Colon
iii. Prostate
b. The good news
and the bad news
D. Risk assessment Questions
1. Family history
2. Blood pressure
3. Blood chemistry
4. Body Mass Index (BMI)
E. See your doctor—best prevention possible!
II. Food and Nutrition (Gotta have it!)
A. HOW you eat
1. Physical position and style
2. What else are you doing?
3. Awareness
4. Using your senses?
5. Plan of Action (Great place to
make changes)
B. WHY do you eat?
1. Emotional Eating
2. Just Because
3. Plan of Action
C. WHEN do you eat?
1. How often? What times?
2. Just Because
3. Plan of Action
D. WHERE do you eat?
1. While in motion?
2. Plan of Action
E. WHO do you eat?
1. Happy Cows and chickens
2. Drinks and pills
3. Plan of Action
F. WHAT do you eat?
1. Portions
2. Variety
3. Suggestions/Plan of action
III. Financial Health
A. The role of debt in our lives
1. Undue pressure to produce
2. Stretches career beyond reasonable
time frame
3. Creates fear when "the times" slow
down
B. Catching up to the power curve
1. Spending is addictive
2. Are you just trying to keep up
with the Joneses?
C. How do you feel about retirement and college funds for your
children?
1. How time works for you
2. How time works against you
IV. Handling Stress (Gotta have it!)
A. Stress free versus DEALING with stress
B. Dealing with the unexpected and/or "not enough time to do
it right"
C. Man's view of stress—What is it? What do I do?
D. Strategies for dealing with stress
1. Simplify – Office Manager; Lawn
help
2. Get organized – Conditions of employment,
clean desk, quicken
3. Take breaks – between patients,
20 minutes at home
4. Exercise regularly -
5. Deal with conflict, don't avoid
it – get skills
6. Get enough sleep - really
7. Be positive
8. Stay connected – family, friends,
coaching, scouts, activities
9. Ten minutes a day
10. Have safe sex
E. Make a plan ahead of time-- don't wait for stress!
1. Take a CD in your car
2. Fill your tank first
F. Dietary ideas
1. Reduce caffeine and sugar intake
2. Take along healthy foods
3. Evaluate your dietary supplements
4. Eat breakfast
5. Drink water
G. Breathing
V. Spiritual Health
A. Cultivate an attitude of gratitude
B. Count your blessings
C. Everything shows up for a reason
D. Make time for personal growth and reflection
E. Connect to your primary relationships
1. Family
2. Extended family
3. Community
4. World
F. Life has meaning and the future looks bright
G. Being present
VI. Future Planning
A. Is this about Retirement Planning?
1. Meaninglessness
2. Connectedness and fulfillment (through
work?)
3. Nothing to take up the void
4. Health issues
5. Mental illness usually precedes
physical illness
B. Instead of Retirement, just look at your FUTURE
1. Begins in the next second
2. What do you want?
a. Health
b. Sexual
function
c. Relationships
d. Meaningful
activities
3. Why would these start later if
you don't have them now?
4. Look at all the potentials
a. What is
missing now and needs expression?
b. Seek out
your passion
c. Consider
part-time work, or a new field
5. Instead of competing, plan to connect
a. Expand
your male friendship circle
b. Work on your
primary relationship
6. Instead of reacting, become resilient
a. Stop blaming
b. Seek new
solutions to old frustrations
7. Instead of power, wield influence
8. Instead of working for pay, volunteer
9. Instead of living to eat, eat to
live
C. Keys to a Meaningful Future
1. Happiness is wanting what you already
have
2. Fulfillment is optimizing the use
of your abilities
3. Satisfaction is improving the quality
of efforts and relationships
4. Security is having the freedom
to pursue your goals
RESOURCE GUIDE
Suggested Reading List
Anthony, Mitch, The New Retirementality, Dearborn Financial
Publishing, 2001
Chopra, Deepak, M.D., Ageless Body, Timeless Mind, Harmony
Books, 1993
Grow Younger, Live Longer, Harmony Books, 2001
Gullo, Stephen P., Ph.D., Thin Tastes Better, Dell Books,
1995
Ivkar, Robert S., O.D., Sinus Survival, Tarcher/Putnam, 1988
Ray, James A., The Science of Success, SunArk Press, 2003
Sheehy, Gail, Understanding Men’s Passages, Random House,
1998
Wyle, Andrew, 8 Weeks to Optimum Health. Alfred Knopf, 1997
Important Websites
HEART DISEASE, HYPERTENSION
American Heart Association (americanheart.org)
National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute (nhlbi.nih.gov)
PROSTATE AND TESTICULAR CANCER
American Cancer Society (cancer.org)
National Cancer Institute (cancer.gov)
American Foundation for Urologic Disease (afud.org)
Testicular Cancer Resource Center (tcrc.acor.org)
DIABETES
American Diabetes Association (diabetes.org)
National Diabetes Eduation Program (ndep.hih.gov)
Regular Checkups/Tests
Blood Pressure, Height, Weight Periodically, 28
years and older
Cholesterol
Every
5 years, 35 years and older
Colorectal Cancer
Periodically, 50 years and older
Prostate Cancer
Every year, 50 years and
older
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